Mentalist Episode Tag: Ruby Slippers, 4x21
by Donnamour1969
Summary: Follow the yellow brick road...Jane and Lisbon discuss a certain movie. Spoilers, 4x21. Friendship/humor. Rated T for mild language.


A/N: This was one of those episodes that sort of sneaks up on you at the end. I was sure I had figured things out, then was pleasantly surprised. I really liked the sensitivity that all the main characters had for poor Archie. The ending was very uplifting. I wish we could have seen Lisbon on stage, but Jane's casual reaction to it was played brilliantly.

I feel with recent spoilers things will start to go downhill soon, so we should all enjoy these last pleasant episodes before the bottom falls out.

Anyway, I went for the obvious topic choice for this tag—_The Wizard of Oz. _I hope I put an interesting enough twist on it to keep you reading.

**Episode Tag: Ruby Slippers, 4x21**

"That was a great show," said Jane as he and Lisbon walked out into the darkened parking lot. "Showbiz always gets the old heart pumping."

Lisbon chuckled. "Really? Has this case, along with your recent _Hamlet _performance, stirred up your desire to tread the boards again?"

"There were certain things about that old life I enjoyed. Entertaining others is a very addictive thing, Lisbon. It's a power trip, I suppose."

She could see this lighthearted conversation taking a dark turn, so she not so subtly took it into a different direction.

"Ever perform in a cabaret?"

He grinned, opening the Citroen's passenger side door. "Does it show?"

She looked up at him in surprise before he winked and put a hand on her shoulder, gently pushing her shocked form down into the seat and carefully shutting the door. He walked around the car and got in, glancing at Lisbon's confused face; she was still trying to decide whether he'd been kidding or not.

"No, Lisbon, I never performed in drag, although I met plenty of people who did in my travels. They always put on one hell of a show. What? You looked relieved."

He buckled up and started the car. She laughed. "Not relieved, exactly. But I would give anything to see you in a dress and wig. You'd make a very pretty girl."

"Why thanks, Lisbon. I'll take that as a compliment."

"As it was intended."

Jane pulled out into the street, drove through the light late-night traffic toward the freeway entrance. It wasn't long before he heard a soft humming to his right: _Somewhere Over the Rainbow._

"A _Wizard of Oz _fan, eh?"

"Of course. What American girl didn't read the book or watch the movie and dream of being Dorothy?"

"Oh, but Lisbon, you aren't Dorothy at all, are you? In fact, if you remember, I long ago established that you are indeed Glinda the Good Witch."

She snickered. "How do you figure that?" she asked, remembering their long ago conversation.

"Well, like Glinda, you believe you are bound by your nature to do the right thing, whatever the cost. Just like tonight, with Archie. He and his friends won't be going to jail for fraud. No one will be serving time for obstruction of justice. You let our Dorothy in there keep her ruby slippers. I've lost count how of many times you've done similar things over the years."

She shrugged, not wanting to acknowledge just how often she'd bent the law to satisfy her own moral beliefs. "I always resented that characterization, though, Jane. For one thing, I think Glinda was a self-serving, conniving bitch."

She said that with such vehemence that he chuckled. "So calling her a _Good Witch _was totally ironic for you, eh? Why?"

"If Glinda had told Dorothy from the beginning what the true power of those shoes were, she would have been spared all the trouble with those scary flying monkeys. She could have gone home right away. But Glinda lied to her, probably so she'd do her dirty work for her and kill the Wicked Witch of the West."

"Aw. You really have strong feelings about this, don't you?"

"Yes. Some people argue politics; I debate the motives of fictional characters in children's books." But her comments were totally tongue in cheek, and he caught the telltale dimples in the glow of a street light they passed. Then a thought occurred to her.

"Minelli called you, Dorothy, if I recall," she told him. "But I'm not so sure about that."

Jane raised an eyebrow, at once immensely curious about which character she might label him as.

"Oh? And who, pray tell, am I in this fairy tale?"

"That's difficult to say, really. The obvious choice is the scarecrow—"

"I'm lacking a brain?"

"That isn't what I meant, though now that you mention it…"

"Ha," he said in amusement, still intrigued by her reasoning.

"You do have characteristics of the scarecrow. You have brilliant plans, but you certainly know you have a brain. No one would ever question it, least of all, you. Where you differ from the scarecrow is that at times you lack common sense, which he had in spades—no offense."

"Gee, Lisbon, how could I be offended by that?" he asked with mild sarcasm. "Please go on. This is fascinating."

Lisbon grinned to herself, and moved to the next possibility. "Hmm…the lion. I don't think you're in any way cowardly, though you act like you are often enough. You run away from explosions, and thankful families of victims. You shy away from guns, even though we all know you know how to use one. I suppose that's the difference. The lion really thought he was cowardly; you just pretend to be."

"Meh." Jane really didn't know whether he should be touched or insulted by that. The truth was, he felt frightened every day of his life. He was still inordinately curious about whom she would settle on, however, so for the moment he kept his thoughts to himself.

"Now, the tin man…if you didn't have certain other characteristics, I'd say he was you."

"Really?"

"Yes," she said, her voice softening. "The tin man thought he didn't have a heart, that he was cursed by what life had brought to him. He thought he would never be able to love anyone again, when in fact he was innately compassionate. You, Jane, have the biggest heart of anyone; it's just a little fractured in places." She thought of how much he loved children, how she suspected he secretly gave to charity, how he occasionally bestowed thoughtful, insightful gifts upon those he cared about. He'd brought roses to a damaged young man this very night.

Jane swallowed over the sudden tightness in his throat. Did she really see him in this way? Before he could thank her, or deny it, or even attempt to find words to express what he was feeling, she spoke again.

"You might actually be closer to the wizard, though, now that I think about it."

"Oh?" he said, trying to be nonchalant when his emotions were spinning. "Do tell."

"The wandering entertainer, pretending to grant wishes with magical powers. Just like the wizard, you sort of hypnotize people into believing what you want them to believe. You created this persona for yourself, but you constantly fear being found out. But this is more who you used to be; not who you are now."

"You sure about that?" he asked. This little exercise suddenly didn't seem so fun anymore. Her analyses were hitting much too close to home to be amusing.

"Yes," she said.

An uncomfortable silence filled the car as Jane drove on Sacramento's version of the yellow brick road—the California freeway system. More like a _gilded_ brick road. He had to smile at his own musings.

"You've put a lot of thought into this, haven't you?"

Though he couldn't see her in the darkness, he could practically feel the heat of her blush coming off of her in waves.

"Yes," she admitted. "Since the day you first called me Glinda."

"Well, so far, I don't seem to exactly fit any of the characters you mentioned. That just leaves the Wicked Witch of the West and a bunch of Munchkins."

She laughed, relieved his good humor seemed to have returned. She hadn't meant to upset him, but it was obvious that she'd stirred up his emotions by the way he was tensely gripping the steering wheel.

"You do tend to put me in harm's way with some of your more wicked plans, and you are on the short side…"

"Says the original Munchkin," Jane countered with a grin.

"Hey!" she countered, in mock offense. "No, you're not a witch; we all know who is truly wicked in our lives," she said. Of course, she meant Red John, and perhaps all the other criminals they came across on a daily basis.

"Then again," she continued. "You could also be Toto."

"I'm a lowly dog now?"

"Toto was to blame for everything. Trouble and Toto both begin with a _T, _after all. And all that yapping was really annoying. Not to mention the fact that Dorothy ran away because of him, and ultimately was thrown into a storm because of that damn dog, and we all remember where that took her…"

He glanced slyly at the passenger side. "Actually, I think we've come upon _your_ true identity, Lisbon. Toto was the one who discovered the wizard, that everything—Oz, Emerald City, the weaknesses of Dorothy's friends—was all a fraud. He wasn't afraid of anything, not even the wizard's theatrics. Ultimately, Toto was the hero of the piece. That, in a nutshell, is you, dear Lisbon."

"Oh, please," she said, but she and Jane both knew she was flattered by his remarks. By this time, Jane had exited the freeway and was heading now down the road to CBI Headquarters.

"You know," she ventured as they pulled into the parking lot. "I'm rethinking Minelli's assessment of you. You _are _Dorothy after all."

"I'm well aware of where I am at all times, Lisbon. And I think I've been to Kansas exactly once."

"At the time, he was telling you to wake up to reality, but he inadvertently hit the nail on the head. You are highly intelligent, compassionate, and loyal to your friends. You're a combination of _all_ the secondary characters. Dorothy it is."

"Thank you, Lisbon," he managed. "But maybe I am the witch too. She was rather single-minded in her pursuits."

"And look what happened to her," Lisbon quipped in a gentle warning.

Instead of upsetting him, her words made him smile. "Well, someday, if you have to clean up a puddle of goo, I hope you'll think of me fondly."

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that."

He parked his car near hers, and she moved to let herself out.

"Well, here we are," Lisbon said, looking fondly at the CBI building. She smirked, her hand on the door handle. "There's no place like home, is there, Jane?"

"And we didn't even have to click our heels."

"Thanks for the very entertaining evening."

"My pleasure, Lisbon. Good night."

They grinned at each other and he stayed while she got into her own car, started it, and backed out. He followed her closely until they parted ways with waves and friendly toots of their horns. As he watched her car disappear in his rearview mirror, a line came back to him from the movie.

"'Oh... what a world, what a world. Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness?'"

She'd had it all wrong, of course, and so had he. _Lisbon _was Dorothy, not Glinda or Toto, and he, Cho, Rigsby, and Van Pelt would follow her down any road she chose. Lisbon was the one who instilled courage, heart, and intelligence in all of them. She made them all better people.

A/N: Okay, a little sentimental, I know. Hope you liked it anyway.

Those of you patiently waiting for "Goldilocks and the Red Wizard,"—I'm working on it, I promise. I wanted to get this tag out before anyone else published theirs with the exact same idea, lol. Thanks for reading! See you back here next week!


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